Monday, February 6, 2012

You Are Loved

This beautiful arrangement of flowers was delivered to me today. A wonderful surprise from the Major for no apparent reason at all but to tell me that he loves me, misses me and thinks that I'm beautiful. It put a smile on my face and made me feel warm on this very cold, winter day.

Telling or showing our spouse that we appreciaite them, love them, care for them and adore them is very important in a marriage. It is very important that we express heartfelt appreciation and love. This doesn't mean that you have to constantly buy your spouse flowers, or other things, but it does mean that they need to feel loved. Just saying that you love them and that you care about them and appreciate them can mean more than you'll ever know.

Years ago, the Major and I each read the book, The Five Love Languages. He had his own book and I had mine.(actually it was 5 years ago when we were going through deployment number 2) After we each finished the book and completed the study at the end of the book, we sat down and discussed what our individual love languages were.

Believe it or not, I am not a gift person, nor do I like acts of service, or words of affirmation.(if you have read the book then you know that these are all love languages) I am a quality time type of person, with a little bit of physical touch thrown in. My favorite thing in the world is spending time with the Major, quality time, throw in the Major holding my hand and/or giving me a gentle kiss on the forehead and you have one happy girl! The Major knows what my love language is, and he knows that I love his undivided, focused attention. Quality time for us is taking a walk around the neighborhood together, sitting in our swing in the backyard, or sitting on our deck drinking a cup of coffee. Somethings in life are still free, and spending quality time with your spouse is one of the best free things in the world!

The Major is most definately a words of affirmation type of person, this is his primary love language. When he has done something for me, or something around the house or for the teens or for work or for someone else, I make sure to make the effort to let him know that what he did meant a lot to the person that he did it for. That his acts of service do not go unnoticed.
We are to be an encourager to our spouse. When I give words of affirmation to my husband I am giving empathy and seeing the world through his perspective, because I know what is important to him. Love is kind and so must also be our words. Words are important.

Although knowing your spouse's love language is very important in a marriage, the one thing that is of most importance is PRAYER. Praying for your spouse is the most important thing that you can do for your spouse. If you and your spouse have never read, The Power of A Praying Wife/Husband, then I want to strongly encourage you to do so. Your marraige and your spouse and yourself will thank you for doing so. When we lay everything at the feet of God and allow God to transform us, our spouse, our circumstances and our marriage, you and your spouse will receive the greatest blessing. When spouses prayer for eachother a oneness is made and the enemy doesn't like it. When the strength of a husband and wife are joined together it is a lot stronger in God's sight than when we are individuals.

When we pray for one another, something happens in our hearts, it melts our hearts and shows us love for one another. When I pray for the Major, my love grows deeper for him and my walk with the Lord grows stronger. There are many times when I pray for the Major about a particular situation and he has know idea that I am praying for or about it, and many times he has said to me, you've been praying about that haven't you because I felt your prayers. When he tells me this, I know that he knows that I love him, because friends, LOVE is the ultimate love language.

Do you know your spouses love langauge? If you do are you acting upon it, are you speaking their love language? If not, don't you want to? Don't you want to know your spouses love language?

Do you pray? Do you lift up your spouse and earnestly pray for them? My friend prayer is such a vital part of our life, it's how we communicate with God. If spouses do not lift one another up, then who will help you when you fall down!

"Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up." Ecclesiastes 4:9&10

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